On Tuesday April 20, 1999, I saw the beginning of the siege on Columbine High School. For the next 10 hours other than retrieving my 14 year old son at school, I was immobilized watching the horror unfold. My dear friends Brent and Denise have a son who attends Columbine. He escaped early, but his life will be forever altered by this experience. My 14 year old son, who's played baseball at Clement Park, was relieved to see the shocked grief-stricken face of his friend on TV. He feared he’d be going to the hospital, or a funeral. My 18 year old son was devastated to recognize Isaiah Shoels, killed partly because of the color of his skin. He was a buddy from Lakewood High two years previous.

As a yoga teacher in Jefferson County I work and live less than 10 miles from this tragedy. Not only are my children in the same school district, most of my students are deeply connected. I have students who are administrators in Jeffco Schools and crisis counselors, students who graduated from Columbine High themselves, students who are paramedics and doctors and nurses and in law enforcement. The list could go on and on. It seems everyone I know was either directly affected or knew someone who was.

School violence has been unbearable to witness when it took place in distant cities in America. In this case, a massacre occurred in our neighborhood. The ripples move out from the center of the horror of the tragedy, touching people even in other nations. In this tragedy we are close to the epicenter, and thus can't forget and go on as if it never happened.

I was born and raised in Colorado, and love it. We have abundant sunshine, the beauty of the Rocky Mountains, and in those mountains, in summer, a flower pokes out of the harshness of rock and wind. It resembles a delicate orchid yet it grows and thrives in the Colorado altitude. The Columbine, whose name is derived from the Latin word for dove, which symbolizes peace, is the state flower. It should now become an international symbol of non-violence.

I've also lived in other countries and experienced life outside the gun culture of America. One news article was entitled “Global Condemnation.'' Many factors contributed to the rage that caused this massacre, but only one thing killed the victims, gun trauma. The statistics fell the truth. "In a 1997 study: The firearm related death rate among American children younger than 15 was nearly 12 times higher than all 25 other industrialized countries combined. There are an estimated 200 million guns in America. In 1996 handguns were used to murder 30 people in Britain, 106 in Canada, 211 in Germany and 9,390 in America."

What does this have to do with yoga? Everything. Yoga is not just bending the body into different positions and it is not a religion. It is a spiritual practice, whose very foundation is based on ahimsa, meaning non-violence. Without non-violence, and the other ethical principles, yoga is no different than gymnastics. In Light on Yoga B.K.S. Iyengar writes that ahimsa is more than a negative command riot to kill, for it has a wider positive meaning, love." He says that this love embraces all creation and must be based on compassion, forgiveness and truth. The truth for me as a result of Columbine is to strive to understand, to practice and to promote non-violence. The horror of this incident has ripped open the heart of this community and we must work to keep our hearts open in the times to come. Part of our community is our teenagers, and I beg you to reach out to them. We can't disenfranchise them because of our fear. We haven't a moment to lose, and we can never give up.

Part of my truth is to also seek strict gun control. As Vice President Gore said at the memorial service: "What say we to the open muzzle of this tragedy cocked and aimed at our heart . . . we can rise up and we can say "no more." It is possible to create change. Let's start some new ripples moving out based on peace, on ahimsa, in memory of those who lost their lives and for all of us grief stricken by the carnage of this culture. Please join me in speaking the truth in any way that is true to your heart. May God bless us all.

Peace